Too Annoyed to Fini....

I starting writing this a few weeks ago. I was so annoyed with my experience that I couldn't bring myself to finish writing about it. Here it is, well after the fact.
________________________________________________________

I can't believe how fucking angry I am right now.

Umpteen mothereffing weeks ago, I scheduled an appointment for a haircut and colour at the "legendary" Rinaldo's Spa. I asked for the most experienced cutter - I wasn't willing to settle for just anyone - I wanted "the best". I was ready to lop off my locks...my loooong, luscious, Rapunzelian locks (translation: matted, bed of tangles and split ends.)

The salon receptionist, in her most practiced fashion drawl, assured me a date with the most stylish of do-makers. The knowledge that I had "to wait" a significant length of time for the meeting with my maker to end all hair-makers made it all the more delicious; well-anchoring a feeling of safety and pathetic self-importance. I fantasized, yes fantasized about my transformation....Oh, how beautiful I would be.

So there I sat - for weeks on end - eagerly anticipating my much needed escape from an eternity's worth of shitbox salons run by 80's throwback hairdo-ists. I began to develop a blind trust - expecting fully to fall into the arms of the most experienced blades in the solar system....oh the sunny days to come...

Here's where the story stops short.

I feel far too annoyed to elaborate in any more significant detail. The rest of this entry is bulleted to preserve my relatively stable mood of the moment.

• Fuck Rinaldo's Salon.
• Fuck trends.
• Never trust a person who is wearing shoes are that are longer than he or she is tall.
• Only Elton John should wear Elton John's glasses.
• Mirrors don't lie.
• There is no way to make oneself disappear from a salon chair without literally getting up and moving (yes, I've tried to make myself disappear - and I have a witness).
• Never, ever, ever book a hair appointment with a friend. Invevitably, the friend will end up looking magnificent and you will have "healthy-looking hair" (thanks, *Elvis)
• Long hair is beautiful. I don't care how matted, or tired it looks. To me, it will always be magnficent.
• A heart-felt thank you to *Elvis for saving the life of that hairstylist dude.

So there you have it. My hair has been cut for the last time. Viva les locks! Long, luscious, Rapunzelian locks (translation: long, luscious, Rapunzelian locks).

*Elvis is the person who joined me at the salon for a "hair transformation" which, incidentally, turned out beautifully ( not at the hands of "my" master cutter, of course). Her name has been changed to protect the oh, so beeee-oooooo-tee-ful...

Pudsy